Teachers Feedback:
1)Well done- lots of good continuity editing throughout- those that I showed it to thought it was in no way confusing, and that it held the viewer's attention.
2) You cut to the beat of your soundtrack effectively most of the time. There are one or two places where this could be even sharper- for example, when the guy leaves the house and throws his coat over his shoulder.
3)Some shots need to be held for a second or two longer. For example, both Blenheim shots, and the first shot near the end of the guy holding his foot on the railings.
4) Some people I showed this to thought it would work well to show what he is looking at on his phone when he wakes- they felt it would give us more of a clue to his character, his motivation, what he was planning for his day- for example, if it was a plan to go somewhere with friends, or a date, or some arrangement, seeing Kasey might set up a situation when the Equilibrium (of his life prior to meeting Kasey) is unsettled/ disturbed. Could this work? Add anything? Or do you want to make a case for purposefully not showing the audience?
5) Nice framing- with Blenheim at start and end, but almost everyone felt they needed to be held for seconds longer.
6) Great font and choice of soundtrack. Were you intending voiceover? It works without.
7) Does the moment that they meet need to be more dramatic? Close-up of his face, and hers looking in other direction. It just feels like a bit of an anticlimactic moment with the series of long and mid distance shots you are using at the moment.
No comments:
Post a Comment